Hi Stuart
you made a
great short film. I like it.
I made some
notions:
1. the
veranda opening door shot: I have a feeling that there is a problem with time,
I do not know how to correct it now, but there is probably a need to let a
little bit longer time between the man is trying to open the veranda door and
the door are opened by other burglar from inside. It was quicker than I can
believed he can went around the house and open the veranda door from
inside. Just my thought.
2. I like
the actors especially Jonathan acted very well. His expressions are convincing
and his voice is suitable for burglar :-). Do they have some experience with
acting?
3. The
humour is great. The passive smoking )))))).
4. The
contrast between the rabbit shot and stairs shot was a little bit disturbing.
5. Your
notions about mistakes: I did not notice any of them when I saw it for the first
time. E.g. the opened door on veranda in one shot and next the door is closed.
I noticed the mistakes after I have read about them but I think the film is
medium where most of those mistakes are seen when you see the film repeatedly.
6. When I
saw the film many times the problem with the time which I mentioned in issue 1
was somehow smaller and smaller. I realized that we need a time probably days
between our critical point of view because when you see the film several times
again and again we can ignore some mistakes.
Anyway,
Stuart made a lot of work and thank you for your sharing it with us.
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